Rocket Singh – Salesman of the year : a review.

I feel guilty for not posting this earlier given how badly the film needed publicity, good at that. But as Meera would say, “Batter letter than nah were”. I saw Rocket Singh a fortnight ago, and most of this review is from what I can recollect.

The absolute first point : much much thanks to Shimit Amin for bringing back D. Santosh from oblivion. D. Santosh, the actor who played Rajguru in the marvelous The Legend of Bhagat Singh, was the thing for me in this movie. When I saw him in TLOBS, I thought he was Marathi in real-life. I saw this movie, and I can swear he is a South Indian. The guy is bloody brilliant, especially in comic roles. Forget the cliched comic timings and delivery, the guy can elicit laughs with just facial expressions. More power to him.

Now the movie.

Bollywood and restrain have never gone together, so movies like Rocket Singh are noteworthy, coming from the Yashraj camp. From the writing stage to the execution, restrain is maintained. Two scenes are representative of this maturity : first, when Harpreet Bedi (Ranbir Kapoor) checks his results and reacts to it — it is not frustration, he doesn’t seek pity, no strong background music; it is just matter-of-factly done. The second, in the climax scene where he is working in a retail outlet and has the final confrontation with his ex-boss. He wins back pretty much everything, but at the end of the scene, there is no celebration. He continues with his work and the scene ends with a slow fade out. This isn’t out-of-the-world writing; this is just one of the basics of writing — consistency of character. But I can see so many writers who would mess such simple things so easily in the flow.

And that is Rocket Singh’s strength. The simplicity of the lead character drives the entire movie, the dialogues and execution — all the while keeping things consistent.

Well, almost. The climax is a debatable topic. I thought about the climax and couldn’t think of a better way to end the story, that would also provide closure to the audience. I was even tempted to think the climax was alright, because the rest of the movie was well made. But if I’m honest to myself, I should say the climax is a let down.

That doesn’t affect the quality of Rocket Singh as a whole. It is a delightful watch, and Yashraj must be commended for backing the story. Shimit Amin and Jaideep Sahni are proven talents, and with every passing movie, Shimit Amin continues to hold his script in the highest esteem : a great sign for mainstream cinema.

The acting : I covered D. Santosh, it is always nice to see good actors getting appropriate roles. Gauhar Khan, Prem Chopra, Naveen Kaushik and Manish Chaudhari are all apt, something we can expect of Shimit Amin’s casting. Shazahn Padamsee does pretty well in her role for her first movie.

Then — of course — there is Ranbir Kapoor. The guy evidently can do no wrong. Give him any role, and he’ll dish out a wonderful performance. Here the role was superb, and he takes it that much higher. I get a feeling that I’ve said the same things about Ranbir in past reviews, but I can’t help it. He just doesn’t give any reason to complain !

I have high hopes from Ranbir — a mainstream actor with good brains can do so much more for Hindi cinema than independent filmmakers with their niche audience. The other hopefuls are the Akhtar siblings — Zoya and Farhan — but they are just different in the same format. In a way, Ranbir Kapoor is the counterpart to Abhay Deol — on the mainstream side.

If you haven’t seen Rocket Singh yet, please do.

One more search query.

WordPress says, a reader stumbled upon this blog for the following search query :

Quick tip, dear reader : if you want to know Taran’s views on SRK, the right query is, “Taran Adarsh views on Shahrukh Khan”.

But if you were indeed looking for what I think you were looking for, then I’m sorry. I can’t possibly cater to all kinds of audiences here. I might consider John Abraham or even Karan Johar in the future, as social tastes evolve. But Taran Adarsh ? No way ! This is a classy blog, just so you know.

India-Pakistan to hold hands.

I heard a rumour of this happening, but today, Cafe Pyala confirmed the collaboration of Times of India Group and Jang Group (of Pakistan) — both media houses on either side of the border — to deliver and share content that facilitates cross-border news transfer that is unbiased and not rhetorical. It’s a great move and a positive sign, atleast for India. Pakistan, on the other hand, will now get news the ToI style. Good luck with that !

Amitabh Bachchan is reportedly the brand ambassador for this collaboration, and wrote this at his blog :

“Their media and our media will through the medium initiate cross over efforts to hold hands, to exchange views and ideas of how to extend our understanding with each other, to build bridges when all else is falling apart,” Big B wrote on his blog.

I’m switching gears now. What is it with Indians and holding hands ?? India is probably the only country where grown up men who are not gay do not find anything wrong with holding hands ! It is still okay if done within national borders, but taking such ideas to the U.S. is just catastrophic.

I once went for a concert with a couple of acquaintances — let’s call them A and B — and B had this habit of holding hands .. with friends .. who were guys .. and he had a girlfriend so we can rule out the gay thing. I quickly excused myself into the crowd only to meet them after the concert. I later caught up with A and asked him what the hell was wrong with B.

A : Yeah, he does that. I’ve told many times not to hold hands in public places, but he doesn’t listen.

All I could say was : WTF !

CHUP’s memorable quotes.

The Changing Up Pakistan (CHUP) blog has put together the best Pakistan related quotes of the year :

1. From RehmanMalik.com, “A welcome massage by Mr. A. Rehman Malik – Minister for Interior.” (Just in case you don’t feel relaxed when you’re in Pakistan.)
2. Columnist Nadeem Paracha defines Imran Khan as, “A man who still thinks the Taliban is a brand name for a series of chubby, cuddly teddy bears.” (Funny because it’s true.)
3. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton to PM Yousaf Raza Gilani, “Excellency you are not a simple politician but a political magician and I am deeply impressed by your way of governance.”  (Hey, Jadoogar. Harry Potter called. He wants his wand back.)
4. Lollywood’s sweetheart Meera, exclaiming, “Oh no jaani no, I work for people day and night, for poor people.” (Poor Meera, she can be such a layer.)
5. A GEO Television reporter, after meeting Tehreek-e-Taliban head Hakimullah Mehsud, said, “Hakimullah is a lively man. He told us he could give us two gifts. One was the Humvee military vehicle that his fighters had captured during a recent raid in Khyber Agency on an Afghanistan-bound supply convoy for Nato forces. The other was a jeep that his men had snatched from UN employees in Khyber Agency.” (I mean. What a gentleman.)
6. The Pakistan Cricket Board’s TMI press release: “The medical board has reported that Shoaib Akhtar was suffering from genital viral warts, and electrofulguration was done on May 12, 2009.” (Shoaib Akhtar was itching to get back on the field after that procedure.)
7. AQ Khan wants us to know more about his special interest in the Makrani people: “Makrani children are extremely cute…They looked very much like African pikaninis with dark curly hair and shiny eyes.” (He also wants us to pray for divine intervention, visit Timbuktu, and continue reading his “Random Thoughts” column.)
   
8. In response to whether Rehman Malik will be arrested after the National Reconciliation Ordinance was declared null and void, PM Gilani told reporters, “Interior Minister arrests people. So who can arrest him?” (Details, shmetails.)
9. President Obama, in an interview to Dawn this summer, “Oh, keema … daal … You name it, I can cook it. And so I have a great affinity for Pakistani culture and the great Urdu poets.”  Dawn: “You read Urdu poetry?” Obama: “Absolutely.” (I also can play concertos blind-folded while plucking a banjo with my toes.)
10. Pakistani cricketer Shahid Afridi: “I would like them to remember me as the craziest cricketer that ever played for Pakistan.” (Boom Boom, Afridi.)

My favourite is Gilani’s, “Interior Minister arrests people. So who can arrest him?”. Honourable mention must be made of this tenacious reporter from Karachi.

I know it is terribly unethical of me to paste all the quotes, but I really couldn’t choose just a few. As a penance, I urge you to check out the CHUP blog — it is one of the few Pakistani blogs I follow, besides Cafe Pyala and Tazeen Javed‘s (before some reader points out Xeb‘s, I meant politically inclined blogs).

Updates.

I don’t have much to offer besides an excuse for slow blogging. In fact, two. The first : I am visiting home (Pune) and after 2 whole years, I am staying at home for more than just 5 days. The previous visits were either short trips or spent alone in the mountains of Ladakh. I also hope this trip will nullify the effect of all those annoying friends who say, “I spent my whole trip at home” within 2 meters of my parents. Before this, my only remedy was making up enough negative stuff about them so that their words lost credibility.

My second excuse is I had to go through the slightly-less-annoying-than-those-friends procedure of getting my visa stamped. Don’t get me started on how silly the process is, but some things are beyond silly. I met a guy at the consulate, who I later realized I knew from Stanford where we took a course together — and cursed it together. His passport was held up for administrative checking. The reason, his name : Ankit Patel. I might even give this one to the consulate, as I was sure there were more than 1 Ankit Patels in the room. I also hope his middle name wasn’t Dineshbhai. That would be a clean hat-trick.

Now I wish him well, but I don’t understand why a guy from Baroda would be named Ankit Patel (they could very well be an entire community fighting for reservation). I suggested his kid be given a non-ordinary Gujju name, !Xobile perhaps. But seriously, who the hell figured out an Ankit Patel would be a terrorist ? Thepla bomber, yes; khakra smuggler, sure; but that’s about it.

A day before the interview, I found out that I left my Stanford degree certificate back in the U.S. It wasn’t a forgot-forgot. I saw it lying around while packing, and decided that it didn’t make much sense to carry it since I’d already shown it home. A tiny fact that I knew, but overlooked — the degree certificate is a very important document for H1.

The interview went smoothly though — the answers to the first 3 questions I got elicited 2 ‘Oooh’s. The rest was fun too, as with most of my interviews. I must mention here that I like to give interviews, of any kind really. How much fun an interview turns out to be only depends on the interviewee.

I had a list of stuff to do in Bombay — mainly eateries, thanks to an overenthusiastic friend who chalked out an entire evening — but skipped it all in favour of indulging my jet lag.

Now I’m back in Pune dealing with questions about my plans for new year’s eve. The real answer is that I hike to a mountain top overlooking Pune — usually alone or with a friend — but I don’t think people want to hear that.

BTW, if you haven’t tried it out, you must. I’m sure your city has a corresponding spot.

Global warming.

This is a true incident that took place about a month ago.

I was having lunch with a friend back in California, and the topic of temperature came up — as it does in all conversations when you don’t have other topics. I mentioned that it touched -1 deg C. the previous night, and how this was the lowest I had seen it go in three winters in the Bay Area.

Friend : Yes, it is because of global warming.

I : But isn’t the temperature supposed to rise due to global warming ?

Friend : No no .. global warming causes the polar ice to melt. So it flows down and causes lower temperature.

I : …

ND Tiwari causes much pun.

It is holiday season and see what Santa has brought the headline writers as a gift — N.D. Tiwari : a 85-year old in a sex tape with 3 women young enough to be his grand-daughters. Here are some chosen headlines :

After sex sting, AP governor Tiwari ejects prematurely.

His sexcellency quits.

N.D. Tiwari stripped — of his job (from today’s Indian Express).

Whiff of scandal takes Tiwari head: Telegraphindia (via @parthajha).

Most of these headlines could pass off as porn titles involving a politician. It’s like some people are re-discovering their ambition to be in the p0rn industry. News is also out that a YouTube clip showing (non-detailed, low resolution and nondescript) screenshots of the tape is one of the most watched videos in India. Here is the video — everyone watch it and tell me why it is the most watched video.

I am outraged at this scandal for one reason — it happened when I was flying to India and I missed all the fun (and pun). I am tempted to criticize the governor for misusing pub(l)ic funds (don’t you dare think I don’t know words that rhyme with funds ! This is a blog intended for family audiences) and screwing the reputation of the office (and secretary) of the governor. It must be condomned in the hardest possible words. Of course, the guy’s long and hard earned reputation is at stake and it is unlikely his statue will ever be erected.

Now regular readers would know that I thoroughly investigate news before reporting it here. So be assured that I am hot on the pursuit of this tape so that I can call out the governor for the right crimes.

Meanwhile, I hear Tata is keen to see the video to use it in its campaign for the Nano, the entire BJP has come out strongly against Tiwari for slandering their age group — the 80-85 year olds — and the Congress used the incident to reiterate why the Aam aadmi ka haath was relevant today, more than ever.

A comment on Paa.

A reader — in reality, someone who stumbled across one post — Aditi Nadkarni comments on the Paa review, in what is detailed enough to be a review in itself and merit a mention (incidental, but true — it also helps me churn out a post for free while I am visiting home). I’m pasting it here — read and enjoy :

Hi Deepak,

I was SO glad at having come across your review after having read about 15 shockingly positive reviews that I almost wept with joy and relief. I watched this film in Artesia CA after being subjected to much hype. There were a few Indians and a few Americans and frankly after watching the film for about 20 minutes I was cringing at the script. I wanted to crawl under my chair and die. I was embarrassed for the actors. Abhishek Bachchan is awkward and unsure of who is supposed to be. Every part of the film is a lift off of some other film. Its essentially a complex conglomeration of the following films: Sarkar Raj, Hey Baby and Robin William’s film Jack.

The dialogs offer pearls of wisdom such as “Not getting pregnant creates “complications” for a woman” and “I am glad I did not have a condom” and repeated references to marriage as “round and round” even by the adults!

The script is poorly written and not at all witty. Some scenes are beyond comprehension. Like for example the scene where Abhishek Bachchan holds his palm under Auro’s butt so he can sit on it! WTH! Or the scene where Auro announces that he wanted to go potty and hence didn’t enter the Rashtrapati Bhavan. 12 year olds DO NOT react or behave like that. Maybe a 4-5 year old. But a 12 year old boy would not sit on a grown man’s palm. What was the point of that scene??

It was a bizarre storyline with absolutely no thought process or proper research devoted to the handling of the protagonist of the plot. And I was shocked at Amitabh Bachchan’s dialog delivery. He was supposed to be 12 but speaks and acts like a 5 year old with a strange accent and people are raving about his acting?

Did you read R.Balki’ reasoning for having made the film? You must. Its up on the Wikipedia page for the film. You might get a clue about why the film’s story and subject matter have been given such little attention by the director.

What astonishes me is that reviewers for all the major dailies and even our Indian audience seem to be gushing over this utter piece of crap. Are we just supposed to be ecstatic that we have steered away from the “boy meets girl, girl’s father is an asshole, let’s do bhangra” plot? Do we not expect anything at all out of our filmmakers? There is no attention to detail. The script sucks, the screenplay is patchy, the plot keeps derailing every 2 minutes, the character analysis is half-assed and one feels no connection or empathy with this protagonist who just looks like a large man in a costume and behaves NOTHING like a 12 year old with Progeria and people still liked it! I just don’t get it. Negative reviews invite backlash from the star fans. You know the film “Jack” with Robin Williams? Even that was criticized by most American reviewers and audiences although it wasn’t even half as bad as Paa. I think after watching Paa some of them might appreciate Jack a little more.

Anyways, I just wanted to thank you for your review. I really wanted to read at least one review of Paa which was honest and not tinted with Bachhan mania. And now I can sleep in peace.

Best,

Aditi

I agree with pretty much everything.

Update.

Blogging has been erratic for the last few days, and will be so for a good number of days.

Meanwhile — and since I haven’t gotten around to write a detailed review — do watch Rocket Singh — Salesman of the Year. I am unsure how I feel about the end, but overall, a fine movie.

Women and low pitched men.

There was a discussion today on an email list I’m part of regarding the history of high pitched female singers in Hindi film music and its correlation to the dominance of Lata Mangeshkar in the industry. Don’t ask me how, this soon led to an exchange on men with deep voices and women and evolutionary psychology. I’ll skip the discussion part and present to you what we concluded :

Women are attracted to men with low pitched (or deep) voices. Citation here.

Now, I know there are mostly *cough* intelligent *cough* female readers here and I would love to tap into the hive for their opinion on this. Do you think it is true ? Please please reply.

In either case, from now on, I’m going down a few notes while speaking.

Link via email by Amit Varma.