Seth Meyers (head-writer of Saturday Night Live) killing it at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner tonight. Also ran: Obama’s address.

Donald Trump was, quite rightly, everyone’s punching bag. If by everyone’s punching bag, you mean roasted alive. It was painful to watch after a while (Trump was in the audience with one camera fixed on him for the evening.) All said, let’s hope Trump runs for President in 2012 (and continues to give interviews such as these).

Imagine Trump in a debate with Ron Paul.

P.S. Trump will do for Darrell Hammond what Sarah Palin did for Tina Fey. I can’t want for Darrell Hammond to be back on SNL. Immaculate impressions took a nosedive when he left SNL.

[Source]

Unlike private airlines’ employees, who have restricted passages and specific definition of family to include only immediate members such as self, spouse, dependent children and parents, Air India’s definition is far more generous.

According to Air India, an employee’s family, entitled to travel free with him/her, includes: spouse, children, step-children, parents, brothers, sisters, sons-in-law, daughters-in-law and even grandchildren up to 12 years.

The sons-in-law of pilots convey their thanks to you for paying their airfare.

[Source]

Air India is now losing Rs 26 crore everyday with the accumulated loss of over Rs 13,300 crore.

If you wanted a reason to feel better about not paying taxes, there’s one.

Prashant Bhushan, one of the lawyers leading the anti-corruption crusade ..

.. led the charge attacking the government’s economic policies since 1991, describing them as “precisely the reason” why corruption had become so pervasive in the country.

Deviating from the anti-politician and ostensibly moral discourse that the Anna Hazare-led campaign has so far maintained, Bhushan, a prominent figure of that campaign, claimed that the process of privatisation had created a “corporate mafia” in the country. He drew a parallel with the situation prevailing in Russia which, he said, had been described by a Russian journalist as a “mafia state.”

I’m glad he is busy policing the government and not the private sector. (Needless to add, what he calls a cause is really a symptom.)

***

One can connect each moment of each of our lives today to post-1991 liberalization. And if you are a bad columnist, you already know what I’m talking about. For instance:

I am writing this post on a laptop sitting in the United States. That’s because the company I work with gave me this machine. Because I studied here and applied for jobs here. Because I came here to study. Because I thought getting a masters would let me enjoy what I want to learn. Because my field is computer science. Because I was addicted to computers since 2000. Because personal computers became commonplace around that time. Because of the 1991 liberalization (proof).

And that’s how it’s done.

[Source]

Comedian Jaspal Bhatti’s satirical rally on corruption on Thursday earned the ire of VHP which accused him of hurting religious sentiments on account of showing a deity as ‘corruption devta’, prompting him to issue an apology.

[Punjab unit chief Vijay Singh] Bhardwaj said that they were opposed to corruption, but by naming a diety as ‘corruption devta’ Bhatti had hurt the sentiments of Hindus.

One wonders how Bhardwaj would react if he started reading blogs or tweets.

***

Bhardwaj is derived from Bharadwaj. It looks like his lineage truncated vowels so everyone (and not just Pnjabis) would pronounce it how they want it pronounced.

Good Filmmaker; Okay Statistician.

A cute short film: Arranged Marriage

Link via Salil B.

This is how you get to the most dangerously located teahouse in the world.

I first saw these photographs half a decade ago and was terrified (I was scared of heights back then). Now, it looks meh.

Remember those laughable amendments to the Information Technology Act? They are finalized now (a nice, scary interpretation here).

In summary, don’t say anything offensive on the internet about our effin’ stupid government or religion or another person or place or animal or thing. You know what, you should probably just stay silent. I hear meditation is great for the inner soul.

Watch today’s South Park episode, especially the techies. You’re going to love it.

Some Half-Baked Thoughts On Cannibalism.

Cannibalism is one of my pet topics. As someone who doesn’t eat either animal meat or human flesh, human flesh definitely interests me much more. Human flesh just feels closer to my heart.

Yesterday, I saw National Geographic’s documentary Eating With Cannibals filmed in Papua New Guinea. I encourage you to watch it too.  [You can quite easily find it if you search for the documentary name followed by any illegal video viewing website -- which is why you shouldn't search for it online. Piracy is bad. It puts hard working people out of jobs. Their families struggle for food. Some even turn to cannibalism.]

I looked around for more videos about cannibalism. Most documentaries seem to be about tribals in Papua New Guinea. It is unfortunate that none of the tribes practice cannibalism anymore. They converted from cannibalism after Christian missionaries arrived and ask them to stop. The documentaries are mostly village elders reminiscing about the good ol’ times.

For a remote area, they perceive both genders as equals: A former cannibal even said that women tasted the same as men. In hindsight, it seems obvious but for some reason, I assumed that women would be more chewy. Anything that makes feminists happy.

Let me feed you some information I gathered about cannibalism:

There are two types of cannibalism: survival and militant. Survival is when a fellow tribal is killed for other reasons (suspected of practicing black magic, adultery, etc.) but instead of throwing away the dead body, the tribals go, “Eh, well. We might as well eat him (or her).” Meat and proteins are hard to come by in rain-forests and human meat is the best. [Go humans!]

Militant cannibalism was practiced by warrior tribes who hunted folks of other tribes for food. The other tribe would then retaliate by hunting and eating one of their folks. The two tribes could have just arranged a formal buffet — but as I said, these are uncouth, tribal people.

Next, this is how they cook human flesh (do no try this at home as it could be fatal for someone):

Once the victim is dead, they cut his/her stomach open, much like how they process pigs. Internal organs burst through the opening and are removed — mainly parts like the small and large intestines. Those taste like sh*t. The body is then cut into two halves so it is easier to carry to a community kitchen. There, the body is first pre-roasted (much like pre-heating) to burn away body hair. (Fun fact: Victims who wax regularly are considered fast food.) Next, the bones and ribcage are carved out from the rest of the flesh. The flesh is hung over fire for slow-roasting. Meanwhile, a shallow pit that acts like a large vessel is covered with leaves. Burning hot stones are placed over the leaves. A few herbs and liquids are thrown in. Once the flesh is well roasted, pieces are cut and thrown into this ‘vessel’. Herbs and liquids add taste, by the way. This is allowed to cook. Aroma tells whether the food is ready. The community then sits around the pit and eats together — like a family. [A family that preys together, stays together.]

Giving it some thought, to me cannibalism seems more morally correct than eating animal meat. Animals cannot defend themselves against human weapons while humans can. To give you an analogy, it is for the same reason why grown men do not get into physical fights with children, or why intellectual debates between men and women are avoided. One group is just so much better than the other that it makes the game unfair.

Now let me grab some food while you figure out if I am a chauvinistic pig or a elite feminist. All this cannibalism talk has made me hungry.